My annual mother's day picture!
I have a love/hate relationship with motherhood. I mostly love it. Really fast, the thing I hate about it, is that is often times makes me feel inadequate. I suppose it's a humbling experience, but some days I don't want to be humbled, or I feel that if I'm humbled any further I just might crack. I just want to be a good mom.
What I love:
My kids are hysterical!
Kacy is so concerned with everything. So conscientious. She's ready to babysit, but she's only 6. (Seven next week, she would be sure to remind me if she were to read this.) She is so protective of everybody, and is Jessie's second mom. If Jessie gets her feelings hurt, and I'm the offender (like when I deny her her ninth cup of juice in less than an hour...) she'll run to Kacy for a hug. Kacy has a serious type of personality. She likes to have fun, but she reminds me of how I think I used to be at that age. A little reserved, likes to play outdoors, watching every one and taking mental notes. She's a good girl, and the perfect first child. She is way more feminine than I ever was... she loves romantical type movies and has been wondering who she's going to marry since she was four. Oh well.
Will is so goofy, and so stubborn. We butt heads often. I hope it's not because we are alike, because he can be so ornery! (Okay, so we are alike?) He has a great big smile and a very sensitive personality. If he gets excited or mad, he has a hard time spitting out his words, and last night he related a dream he had about skeletons driving a train, and the "caplice's" came and put the plastic skeletons in a cage made out of bananas... He is turning into a good worker. On Saturday we had a church service project to haul away brush from a park, and Will worked the hardest and longest of all the kids. Yea!
Ed could have his own book written about him. He does have his own category on the blog... because he is the one who says and does the weirdest things. He is starting to grow up- my biggest concern with Ed has always been keeping him out of the hospital and alive. It has been a miracle that he has not been hit by a car in the parking lot yet, or that I haven't had to call Search and Rescue. His life isn't over yet, and I'm sure I'll meet the S&R crew someday, but so far, so good. He is a child who could be raised by wolves and come out the better for it.
Jessie is a sweet way to wrap up having babies. She is mostly so nice, and everyone seems to love her. She is very helpful, and cleans up after herself. She loves her momma. After having the boys, she is a refreshing breath of girl-ness. She likes to do things for herself. She knows when I'm upset, and tries to comfort me.
Both my boys have an, "it's too hard, can you do it for me?" attitude, and both my girls have an, "I do it!" attitude. Ask them to put shoes and socks on, and the girls have not only put theirs on, but have found the boys shoes and are telling them to hurry up and get dressed. So funny. My kids love to help in the kitchen, which makes me a little sad right now because our trailer kitchen is so small they can't help. It's too dangerous for 99% of what we do. I can't wait to have a BIG kitchen. (Don't tell them that part of the reason I want to cook with them is so they can start cooking and baking without me... what's better than cupcakes you didn't make?) I'm about ready to say "Okay! Stop growing up now!" But, at the same time, I can't wait to see how they turn out. It's a little sad to watch your kids grow up, but I also love it. I would hate to have the power to stop them from growing, because I would have killed my parents if they kept me as a kid forever. I prefer being a grown-up! I am thrilled to be entering the next phase of our parenthood, homework and all. Just kidding about the homework part- ugh.
Some special mother's day moments:
*Will got in trouble for spitting. On Jessie. He's got great aim, and spits like a boy (I spit like a girl, where the spit flies all apart and everywhere), and he got busted. So gross.
*The spitting incident aside, the kids were really well behaved! It was probably the best Mother's Day I've had since becoming a mother!
*Got to watch Spencer (one of my nephews) play with a puppet kitty in a most hilarious way- the cat gave birth to "kitties" who were actually lots of "My Little Ponies," and they were lined up nursing on the kitty because they were hungry. I think Spencer was really born to live on a farm, since he seems to LOVE animals, and had a three year stint as wanting nothing more than to be a cowboy. He's also a really, REALLY good reader- like he's ending the first grade but reads (and understands) at a fourth grade level. I can see him coming to stay with us for the summer when he gets older and we have horses, mules, and every other manner of beast. He can be a guide!
*Spent time with my mom and Ryan's mom.
*Got to squeeze the fattest baby thighs I've ever seen on my niece Charlotte. Pictures soon to come.
*Listened to the youth in our ward (church) get up and say nice things about their mothers. Two boys in particular nearly killed me with their sincerity.
*Got to see three of my kids sing with the primary. Kacy and Ed went up without hesitation, but Will had to be convinced. The women in the ward got chocolate and a bookmark! Very nice.
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!